We are blessed once again with the sweet gift of midweek Premier League football. That means I’m back – fresh off Sunday’s winning parlay – to deliver more elite-level wisdom (or at the very least, confident guessing).

I trust you all spent those Sunday winnings responsibly. Paid a bill. Bought groceries, or, like true visionaries, you’ve set it aside to reinvest in the midweek masterclass you’re about to read.

Let’s aim for another profitable matchweek. At this rate, my early retirement fund might actually end up with some money in it.

Anyway, here are my picks for Wednesday night’s action.

Arsenal to beat Brighton

Wednesday, March 4 (2:30pm ET / 7:30PM GMT)

Arsenal dispatched Chelsea on Sunday and seem to have firmly parked that embarrassing Wolves draw in the “let’s never speak of this again” drawer.

Brighton, meanwhile, scraped past Nottingham Forest thanks to Danny Welbeck, who continues to score goals like a man who refuses to age out of the Premier League. Somewhere, science is studying him.

Arsenal know the stakes. The “bottlejobs” tag has followed them around like a shadow for years, and they’re desperate to shed it.

I expect Mikel Arteta’s side to handle this with relative ease and a couple of set-piece goals most likely.

Of course, I’ve said that before – and the “bottlejobs” label didn’t appear out of thin air.
Still, Arsenal win for me.

Man City to beat Nottingham Forest

Wednesday, March 4 (2:30pm ET / 7:30PM GMT)

Man City edged past Leeds last time out to keep pressure on Arsenal, but there’s something slightly off.

They’re winning, yes – but without that usual cold, mechanical ruthlessness. It’s like the Terminator learned empathy.

That said, you don’t need to be ruthless to beat Nottingham Forest right now. You could probably get a result against them with a spork and a bit of enthusiasm.

It’s getting bleak for Forest. Even their fans must be looking at the ownership situation, wondering what on earth went wrong after last season.

This should be comfortable for City. If you’re feeling bold, you could add in over 2.5 goals.

But for once, I’ve chosen peace. Straight City win. Safety on. Helmet fastened.

Man United to win vs Newcastle

Wednesday, March 4 (3:15pm ET / 8:15PM GMT)

Betting against Newcastle at home requires courage, but betting on a team with Nick Pope in goal right now requires blind faith and possibly a signed waiver.

Manchester United have been flying under Michael Carrick – winning every league game bar the draw with West Ham. A draw I personally welcomed, purely because it meant one overly confident fan had to postpone his celebratory haircut.

Newcastle can certainly make this a hard game if they are up for it, but right now, they are playing like they have erectile dysfunction and can’t get up for anything.

I expect it to be tight – and if it swings either way, don’t be shocked if it involves a moment of chaos to decide it.

Will this week go exactly to plan? Probably not, but here is to hoping that Wednesday delivers some more profits and not just some character building.

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